What to Write in a Condolence Card

Writing a condolence card isn’t easy. Grief is deeply personal, and expressing sympathy can feel overwhelming – especially when your relationship with the deceased or their family is either very close or quite distant.

Above all, be sincere and gentle. Whether you’re writing to the family of an elderly person, a grieving friend, or a neighbour, the goal is to offer genuine compassion and comfort.

A typical condolence card includes:

1. Greeting: Dear Anna / Dear Mrs Smith / To the Müller Family

2. Opening line: Expressing sadness or sympathy

3. Main message: Sharing memories, offering support

4. Closing sentiment: Wishing strength or peace

5. Farewell & Signature

Here's a hort example:

We were heartbroken to hear of your father’s passing. Please accept our heartfelt condolences and know that we are thinking of you.

For a friend:

Your mother was a wonderful person, and I’ll miss her dearly. Sending you all my love and strength.

For a neighbour:

We were so sorry to hear about your husband’s passing. Please know that you are in our thoughts.

For distant relatives or colleagues:

Please accept our sincere condolences. May your memories bring you comfort during this difficult time.

For an elderly person:

A long, well-lived life has come to an end. We are thinking of you and sending peaceful thoughts.

Sometimes just a few words can speak volumes. Here are some popular and comforting short sympathy quotes you can include:

- With deepest sympathy

- In loving memory

- Those we love don’t go away, they walk beside us every day

- What remains is love and memory

- Gone from our sight, but never from our hearts

If you’re not sure where to start, here are a few ready-to-use condolence messages you can personalise:

Short condolence card template:

Sending heartfelt condolences and wishing you strength in the days ahead. Thinking of you with sympathy.

For a grieving family:

Dear Müller Family, we are deeply saddened by your loss and send you our sincere condolences and warmest thoughts.

Whether or not to include money in a condolence card depends on local customs and your relationship with the family. In some areas, it’s traditional to give a small amount of money for flowers or a memorial fund.

Example wording:

Instead of flowers, please accept this small gesture in memory of [Name].

Yes – a modern condolence card can still be respectful. You might choose a card with a soft floral design, a nature motif, or a more informal tone, as long as the message is heartfelt and considerate. Sharing memories, photos or even small moments of joy can also bring comfort.